Run of the Bridal Mill

As far as life hazing experiences go, there are two items that are always at the top of the agenda: 1. At 11 my mom unilaterally decided that it was time that I got my first bra. Rather than take me to Jordan Marsh and make it a non-traumatic experience, she took me to Lady Grace, where I was felt up and measured by a 90 year old woman who thought nothing of barging in on me while I was still topless and announcing "sweetie, it's nothing to be ashamed of, every girl's got' em!". 2. Going to David's Bridal.

I have nothing against David's Bridal, per se, I was just extremely spoiled by my last bridesmaid experience where I went to Michael's of Boston and was waited on by Michael himself. The man knew dresses, fabrics, and stitches inside and out. After having an intense 45 minute conversation with my mother about serger sewing machines, I was convinced that my mom secretly wished that she had given birth to a gay son instead of a straight daughter.

However, that $350 experience was worth it, since the bride, in her ultimate wisdom, decided to let us all wear a dress of our choosing so long as it was black. You know how brides like to convince you that you can wear your bridesmaids dress again? Well, this time it was completely true, so it turned out to be smart investment. Not so when you have to wear a formal ballgown in a color called "apple".

Per the bride's orders Dee and I went to David's Bridal last night to pick out our dresses for an upcoming wedding. After being there for about 40 minutes, and almost getting stuck in a gown (seriously, David's Bridal, maybe you should clearly mark your dresses as "junior bridesmaid" before I envison spending the rest of my life stuck inside a dress that I can't get off), a lady came over to help us. 15 minutes later I found a dress that fit, that I looked hot in (well, as hot as one can look in a bridesmaid dress), and doesn't need too many alterations. Best of all, they had my size and color in stock so I could bring it home with me which I was pleasantly surprised about.

David's Bridal wasn't the over-the-top traumatic experience I was expecting. Sure, the service at an upscale bridal boutique is a billion times better but for a dress that you're really only going to wear once, it's a brilliant alternative. Oh, and because David's Bridal is a national chain, there appears to be a fairly brisk market for used bridesmaid dresses on eBay. I'll likely be posting my apple-tastic dress on there, thus saving another non girly-girl from the David's Bridal experience.