It's Social. Demented and Sad, But Social

Like many of you superstars who became of age in the 90's, most of us chipped our social networking teeth on AOL instant messenger (aka: AIM). Unfortunately IMing your roomate that was 5 feet away wasn't nearly dorky or impersonal enough, so we spawned bastard step-children like Friendster and Myspace. I recently moved on to Facebook where I am completely overwhelmed by the updates from everyone I've ever met. Dan is peforming voodoo for the Red Sox? Harry met Sally using Friend Finder? Am I seriously expected to give a shit?

Because I obviously have way too much free time, I stumbled upon twitter.com today which allows users to update their friends on their life via SMS messaging. Every mundane activity you perform (eg: waited in line at Dunkin Donuts for 7 minutes, got a large extra extra) can be documented and broadcasted to everyone you hold near and dear. I suppose it gives a new meaning to the word "alibi".

Subconsciously, most of us are micro-managing our friends via these constant bullentins. Without them personally telling me, I know when my friends have gotten promoted, bought new homes, landed jobs, and aced an exam. To be honest, it completely sucks. Sure I'm happy for everyone's accomplishments but what happened to picking up the phone (or at minimum, an email) to let your friends know of your proud achievement? Even if you're a person who steers clear of the limelight, a happy, live reaction to something positive is warranted every once in a while.

Social networking is a powerful tool but these constant generic updates are a little much. Updates: use 'em, don't abuse 'em and for goodness sake, let me know personally if you have something exciting to share. I work out of my bedroom and completely get off on knowing that my friend's professional and personal lives are way more exciting than mine. As far as keeping me in the loop next time you make a DD run, please don't update blast me unless you're kind enough to grab me a medium, milk no sugar.